I Am Not An Expert or a Leader: Trying to Bourdain My Way in Math Education
I don’t have a math degree. I quit teaching in 2013 because I spent the last few years in indescribable misery — discrimination, lack of recognition, no respect, and labored discussions on assessment(not math). I lost a math business to a fire in 2015. At the age of 50, I was borrowing money from my parents to pay rent. A quarter of my teaching career was in a school that had kids who had lived on the street, had criminal records, and came to school high(to cope with lives that scraped the bottom of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs).
In spite of always climbing uphill with the pace of one step forward, two steps back — with an occasional falling and rolling down the hill — I have managed to leave tiny imprints on math education. Some days, not sure how. But, everyday, immensely grateful…
I have written two books. I have spoken at the Museum of Mathematics. I have spoken at SXSWEDU. I have spoken at the Fields Institute in Toronto. I have given a TEDx Talk merging punk ideology, teaching, and mathematics.
Oh, and teaching at that tough, urban school in Toronto? Probably the best 5 years of my teaching life. Got buckets of perspective, and realized most of the discussions we have in math education are dancing on the top of the Maslow’s pyramid. Not sure if addressing the fraction deficiencies are a priority when a student comes to your class hungry, abused, or neglected.
We seem to be quick to judge — heavily judge — when math educators make missteps with questions that challenge some of the sensitivities around equity awareness. But, its mostly crickets when our textbooks are stockpiled with questions that have references to mortgages, cars, swimming pools, vacations, etc.
That is because math education, while having a clear vision on equity/race, isn’t as clear on equity/class. How could it be? Math education is a functioning business appeasing the middle class.
But, this is not math education’s fault. This is the fault of the general inequities of education and the class structure. While it is fine to pay millions/year to some white, male NCAA basketball coaches, the players that play the game(mostly black) are not allowed to profit one nickel.
It is that kind of mentality that drips and seeps into math education
Having just seen one of the last interviews with Bourdain, I realize that his influence on me is not just everlasting, for in terms of math education, it is eerily paralleling how he saw the world of cooking/television.
In this interview, in just the first two minutes, he comments on how much he loathes competency and convention — the strict following of a cliched script that everyone is doing. He said he would rather fail. He talks about his own failures. His own shortcomings. The shortcomings of Parts Unknown — that it didn’t have enough stories told by women(often this was because of cultural inequities). Here is the entire interview.
He — fuck I hate writing this word, “was” — a breath of fresh and honest air in an industry that is filled with gaming the system, pursuing relevance(as opposed to just being real), and just being woefully competent.
That is exactly my opinion on math education. I would rather start from scratch and fail, then plod along with competency that is orchestrated and legislated with tradition, politics, and status.
So, hopefully you will forgive me if I see the kind of mathematics that is traditionally practiced in most places as benign, rooted in classism, industrialization, and elitism. The model is so heavy and complex, that the average classroom teacher has neither the time nor the resources to change the system. And while many want to, just as many don’t.
I don’t advocate for changing the system. I advocate for breaking the system.
And, even if what we create fails, so what. It’s failing already. Failing to understand that mental health issues are on the rise among students — younger and younger everyday. I think it is becoming morally wrong to test kids over and over and over…
78% on trig transformations. I am not trying to be smart, but what the hell does that mean? Any need to address the “missing 22%”?. Driving a car carries far more importance than trig, and it’s only pass/fail to get a license.
Driving around with a card that says B- driver would be kind of weird.
My own daughter(10) has been seeing a counselor because of the stress she feels at school because of grades and homework. I mean, how many more red flags do we need to see to realize that whole system is closer to the Pink Floyd caricature than something that is playful, holistic, democratized, and happy.
Equity and inclusiveness goes beyond skin color. It goes to edge of those who are marginalized for anything — from their class status to their views. I have worked in poverty and have lived in poverty. Everything you have read here and elsewhere from me has come through those lenses.
Bourdain’s influence transcended food, travel, and television. He ate with anyone and anywhere. Using anything as a conduit for connection. For me personally, mathematics’ purpose is exactly like that — making connections with people.
Mathematics is for friendship. In a world that seems to be getting colder and more detached, that is what I am signing up for.
I want to be part of leadership, but I want no part in being a leader or an expert in this field. Which means, I want to be part of a collective that values everyone equally, regardless of their background/status.
Please, go back to the top and read the quote in the thumbnail picture of this article. Mathematics is bigger than the world. So, if Bourdain were still here, he would instruct us to share his journey of wisdom — that we have a far way to go.
A very far way.
We should be humbled by mathematics and be grateful that we will never figure it out. Outside of we should be playing with mathematics and enjoying failure, I don’t have much to say on the topic
For good or for bad, just trying to navigate the world of math education with humility, kindness, and honesty. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, I tried.
In the words of Brene Brown, “I showed up”.
